EQ: The What
Before we dig deeper into Emotional Intelligence, take a moment to reflect on your current level of emotional intelligence. Your responses will help guide your growth as we continue. Let’s get started!
Self-Assessment: EQ - The What
Do I think about how my emotions affect my decisions and interactions?
How well do I manage my emotions, especially in stressful situations?
How much do I understand the feelings and needs of others on my team?
Do I listen to others without judgment and try to see their perspective?
Am I genuinely empathetic?
What drives and inspires me as a leader?
Am I passionate about my work and making a positive impact?
How committed am I to improving my emotional intelligence as a leader?
Remember, this self-assessment is just a starting point for understanding your Emotional Intelligence as a leader. It's essential to reflect on your responses and actively work on areas where improvement is needed. Additionally, seeking feedback from others and working with your ECFL Leadership Coach can provide valuable insights into your emotional intelligence strengths and weaknesses.
The journey to become an effective leader is challenging. Often, individuals get promoted to positions of leadership because of their technical expertise in a given field. However, and as you may have experienced yourself, being a leader takes more than just being good at a job. As you move up in your career, you'll find that leadership isn't just about technical skills. It’s also about managing people. This is where Emotional Intelligence (EQ) comes in. EQ is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage your own emotions, as well as the emotions of others. To be a great leader, you need both strong self-awareness and emotional intelligence, which together will help you build strong relationships, solve conflicts, listen to others, and motivate your team.
The good news is that EQ, like a muscle, can be improved through practice and effort. Researcher Daniel Goleman reminds us in his book, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, that in many ways, emotional fitness is like physical fitness. It’s built through intention, habit, and repetition.
“When a man is prey to his emotions, he is not his own master.”
What is Emotional Intelligence - EQ?
Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is the ability to understand and manage your emotions, as well as recognize and influence the emotions of others. First defined by researchers John Mayer and Peter Salovey in 1990, EQ became widely known thanks to Daniel Goleman, who highlighted its importance for leadership in his 1998 Harvard Business Review article "What Makes a Leader.” He explained that while IQ and technical skills are important, EQ is what sets great leaders apart.
The 4 Components of EQ:
Self-Awareness: Recognizing and understanding your own emotions.
Self-Management: Effectively managing your emotions.
Social Awareness: Understanding the emotions of others.
Relationship Management: Building and maintaining healthy relationships.
We’ll be exploring each in more detail in the next lesson.
Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is crucial for effective leadership. Leaders with high EQ are able to manage emotions in a constructive way, navigate challenges, and build strong relationships. EQ also improves decision-making, conflict resolution, and communication.
Leaders with strong EQ understand their own emotions, triggers, and biases, allowing them to respond thoughtfully in any situation. This level of self-awareness sets a positive example for their team, creating an open, productive, and supportive work environment.
“Let’s not forget that the little emotions are the great captains of our lives and we obey them without knowing it.”
Emotional Intelligence in Action
Throughout history, we find examples of leaders who have demonstrated high levels of Emotional Intelligence, both in their regular daily interactions and when faced with the most historical of challenges. Among these notable leaders was Abraham Lincoln.
Abraham Lincoln was a master of Emotional Intelligence. Not only was he able to remain calm and collected under pressure, but he was always mindful of the needs and concerns of others. He was also a proficient communicator, skilled in both writing and orating, and he was able to build strong relationships with people from all walks of life.
Lincoln's EQ was particularly evident in his leadership during the American Civil War as he united the country behind a common cause, navigating the many challenges of the war with wisdom and compassion.
Entrepreneur and co-founder of Virgin, Richard Branson, is another leader also considered to possess high EQ. Branson has recognized the influence and need for a strong Emotional Intelligence and was quoted saying: "I think being emotionally intelligent is more important in every aspect of life—and this includes business. Being a good listener, finding empathy, understanding emotions, communicating effectively, treating people well, and bringing out the best is critical to success. It will also help you build a business that really understands people and solves their problems, and it will make for a happier and healthier team too." He further added: "If I had let my IQ and my school grades determine my success, I certainly wouldn't be where I am today."
There are many ways that possessing a high EQ can benefit you as a leader. Here are just a few:
Decision Making: EQ helps leaders manage emotions and stay calm under pressure, leading to better decisions.
Conflict Resolution: High EQ allows leaders to understand different perspectives and find solutions that benefit everyone.
Building Trust: Leaders with EQ are seen as authentic and trustworthy, helping to build strong relationships with their teams.
Adaptability: EQ helps leaders navigate change and support their teams through transitions.
Employee Engagement: When leaders show empathy and understanding, employees feel more valued and are more motivated to contribute.
Innovation and Creativity: EQ fosters an open environment where team members feel safe to share ideas and take risks.
So, where do we begin on this journey of building our Emotional Intelligence?
Just like constructing a solid foundation, a strong EQ supports career success, better leadership, and stronger relationships. High EQ helps manage stress and keep the job site running smoothly. But remember, while emotions are part of the process, leaders must keep decisions grounded in logic, not just feelings. Let’s look at the best practices for building a solid EQ foundation:
Cultivate emotional awareness: The first step in developing your EQ is becoming more aware of your emotions. Pay attention to how you feel throughout the day and identify what triggers those emotions.
Learn to manage your emotions: Once you are aware of your emotions, focus on managing them effectively. Find healthy ways to handle stress and anger, and express your emotions positively and productively.
Practice empathy: Work on understanding and sharing the feelings of others. Put yourself in their shoes and try to see things from their perspective.
Build strong relationships: Strong connections are key to success in life. Be genuine, authentic, and willing to listen to others to foster meaningful relationships.
Be mindful of your communication: Pay attention to how you communicate. Your tone, body language, and word choice all influence how others perceive and respond to you.
As we wrap up this first session on Emotional Intelligence, remember that building your EQ is like constructing a solid foundation: it takes time and dedication, but the payoff is worth it. Before we dig into the key components of EQ in our next session, take a moment to reflect on the tools you've gained today. This will prepare you to keep adding layers to your personal and professional growth.
Reflection Questions:
Do the people you work with and work for know how much you care about your work? About your teammates? About those things you are truly passionate about?
How do you use your emotional intelligence to motivate and engage your team members, especially during challenging projects or periods of high stress?
Can you identify a recent situation where your emotional reaction surprised you? What triggered that reaction, and what did you learn about yourself?
To push your understanding of Emotional Intelligence to the next level, explore these valuable resources. They'll help you expand your leadership skills and boost your ability to communicate effectively.
What Makes a Leader?
Daniel Goleman
What People (Still) Get Wrong About Emotional Intelligence
Daniel Goleman
Emotionally Intelligent People Embrace These 10 Simple Rules
Justin Bariso